Ok, I’ll admit that is purely “self-talk!” I suppose it is somewhat reality, since I am obviously still here. Today is different than yesterday, and yesterday sucked a big one overall. Today is different, not better but different. I think I should stress that? No day is good. I have come to realize that and …
Category: Blog
Apr 03
Holiday Blues, and Grays
I guess even my computer doesn’t want me to write today. I had to refresh the page twice to get this to work. Maybe it was testing my commitment? There are no coincidences, just realities. I have the holiday blues again. Not surprising. Everyone else is getting ready to celebrate Easter, but the Bunny won’t …
Apr 02
Up on the Mountain Top (aka Soap Box)
Another day, same stuff. Well sort of. I admit that I am somewhat preoccupied by what I suppose I could call, generally, “social injustices.” I really don’t like that term, but I can’t come up with a better one at the moment. Some of you don’t know me as well as others. Do you know …
Mar 31
The Politics of Grief
Well, if you disagree with my use of the word politics, let’s get it out now. I did look it up, but my inner knowing strongly suggested that I use that as my title. I began a post the other day, Thursday morning, about how I was feeling that day and simply titled it “What’s …
Mar 22
Just Stuff
I began this originally by basically apologizing for my ideology. I don’t like to alienate people, as I believe that we all have common threads that unite us if we could all just see past our judgments and biases. ALL of those are learned, and as you well know we usually find out at some …
Mar 15
Several Days Worth of Stuff
No, I haven’t written in several days for several reasons. I have been very busy with work. So busy in fact that I have barely had time to go to the bathroom some days. And when I am not busy, it only takes seconds for me to miss my baby girl and have a short …
Mar 03
Long and Winding Road
Ah, that song, or at least that verse, plays out over and over in my mind today. I was on the way to work this morning thinking that I would write about joy. Not my joy, but the idea that joy instead of constant fear would change the whole world. And it would, but the …
Mar 02
Just…Missing Erin
I don’t know what more seems like a dream: Erin dying, or remembering that I had a daughter. Because neither seem real most days. Her memory is fading, at least in ways that make the absence very pronounced. Her “balloon” that she drew on in early July, all of the air suddenly came out on …
Feb 19
Fighting for My Light
Yes, that’s a play on words. I am truly fighting for my light, which in this case is “life” as it is all that I have left in this “life” so to speak. In that regard, yesterday was a dark day. If I could describe what this level of sadness feels like to you, it …
Feb 18
Survival of the Lightest?
After posting This Little Light, I began thinking about survival. Survival instincts are what really spurred me to write the other blog post to start with. I had a bad night on 2/16, and as I was crying myself to sleep I had a fleeting thought of someone coming into my aunt’s home with a …