Category: Erin’s Memory

This content is about Erin Canter, my daughter who passed away at 10 years old on 8/14/14.

Messages from Erin

I had already planned to tell you about the Red Teletubby. I assume he has a name, but I don’t know what that is so he’s the Red Teletubby to me. For two weeks now, while I’ve been working in my new “home office” in our one extra bedroom, Buffy has been clawing at the …

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Go for the Gold 2018 on September 15

Please consider supporting families with children battling childhood cancer at this year’s Go for the Gold Run/Walk road and trail race. This is the 2nd annual race and we are pleased that it continues to honor Erin, as well as Sam Harmon. You can register for the race here (registration includes a Tshirt). You can …

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Not Amused on 8/14/2017

So I posted on my Missingerin.net site, but I don’t fully express there because there is always the chance that one of her friends might be reading it. I do not want a child to have to be exposed to the immense feelings of grief and well, negativity that it brings. At home, we can’t …

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Musings for 8/5/2017

I realized that I in fact did not finish my lament two days ago. I meant to write yesterday but got distracted when the cable/internet went out for FIFTEEN HOURS just around 3:30 pm yesterday. We knew how long it was out because Shaun couldn’t sleep and was up when it came back on. I …

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Musings for 8/3/2017

Despite my best efforts, this month is taking a toll on me. I am very tired, achy, and right now have a smashing case of brain fog. It’s true that ignoring something doesn’t make it go away or better, but sometimes you just have to not consciously think about things. I literally think of Erin …

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Missing Erin

I don’t know if I ever posted this. It was the tile Erin’s classmates did in her memory for their 5th grade legacy project, which I understand was a chandelier. It is Fawn I believe, who is the animal fairy. Erin loved Fawn and animals in general. Many of you remember that tomorrow, August 14 …

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Black Days

Yes, that’s a throwback to the Soundgarden song and how I am feeling. It’s a crappy day when you cry the entire ride to and from the gym, and then some after you get back in the house. Let me share the first bit of the lyrics with you… Whatsoever I’ve feared has come to …

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Be-Reaved

It had not occurred to me that the meaning of bereaved was literally “torn apart.” That is exactly what happens to you during grief of any sort. While I have to admit to myself that losing a child must be the absolute worst, I also know that grief is relative to the situation and the …

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Hard Days Night

I wanted to post yesterday but I have been extremely busy. I started coming back into “the office” to assist with a contract transition and close out, and will be here for awhile most every day. It has been a nice distraction because “work me” smiles and chats and tries to uplift my staff. It’s …

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Happy Birthday Erin, We Miss You

Today, unfortunately, is all about it being Erin’s 11th birthday and her not being here with us to celebrate it. Sad doesn’t begin to describe it, but sometime during the night I became somewhat numb. Maybe it was the fatigue. I felt like I was up all night. I don’t know if I posted it, …

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