Musings for 3/15/2017

Oh I just had to! Hehe! The Ides of March has given me some giggles this morning. I saw another where it was a Caesar salad and was just a bowl of lettuce with a bunch of knives stabbed into it. My kind of humor!

All jokes aside (or maybe not), I decided this morning to draw a tarot card. I haven’t in awhile. I’ve told you tons of times how I get into “funks” and just do nothing, or very little, and then have to make myself motivated again. I’ve been in one of those regarding writing here. I started writing on Monday and scrapped it, but the tarot has me writing again.

I meant to draw A card, but instead when I cut the deck 3 cards fell out for me so I turned them over in order. Two of Swords, Death, and a reversed Hermit. I actually smiled as these are so appropriate.

The Two of Swords is a lady sitting blindfolded with her face in between two crossed swords. Swords are truth – they cut to the truth. But the thing about this lady, she can remove the blindfold and move away from this “crossroads” at any time. She isn’t bound. She is just not taking action. She is stuck in a quagmire of her own making. Yep, that’s me!

The Death card often scares the hell out of people. And if I had an illness I would be unnerved. But in most cases Death symbolizes out with the old and in with the new. It’s even more powerful than the Tower card in my opinion. The Tower may be further along the journey than Death, but it leaves the pieces of what has blown to bits and you can try to put them back together. Death is just that – death of a habit, a relationship, parts of self, so on and so forth. It paves the way for new beginnings that might even be unknown to you as you have no pieces. It’s card 13 in the Major Arcana (The Tower is card 16). 1+3=4 which is the number of the heart chakra. I think that it’s very fitting, although I would have to speculate on the many things not serving me currently that need to “die.”

Then the Hermit, reversed. The Hermit has a nice lamp lighting his way but he is alone. Sometimes this alone-ness is needed, but honestly, I have become a recluse both physically and even somewhat in the cyber world. The Hermit reversed is telling me it is time to walk my path with others. I have gone past the healthy point, which I do know, but needed to see it.

I’m actually still smiling about my cards today. It was like an old friend stopping along to give me advice. And it was, because it was ME! The Tarot are just tools to connect with our Soul-Selves and sometimes our guides or guardian angels. Even if I am not hearing or feeling the message, seeing it in print will get my attention usually.

It also gives me some clarity on issues that I tried to write about on Monday. Honestly I felt like I was just complaining so I scrapped the whole thing. I am also having an irritation moment with someone I know who I no longer find myself liking very much, and I asked for clarity on that yesterday. It seems I got it in this all encompassing message.

Over the last few weeks I have had a tremendous amount of difficulty accomplishing anything that involved other people, or even equipment. Multiple calls to my cable company, multiple visits to the service center, and on Sunday I was treated horribly by 3 agents, the last of who was polite but refused despite repeated requests to get me to a supervisor to complain about the first two. It was like I was not connecting (which was my internet problem and TV too!) but I could not see that at the time. I also have had trouble trying to schedule companies to come install a water filter and the associated granite hole for the spout, as well as landscaping. It’s like I speak but they do not communicate with me despite multiple questions and detailed answers (on my part).

Even the granite driller guy was more interested in my indoor trim than he was drilling the hole (because he may have trimmed my house out when he worked in that industry). I honestly had a hard time getting rid of him after he was done with the hole drilling!

I have also had issues with my phone not ringing. I know it’s not because I see voicemail pop up, but it has not rang and is right in front of me. Ya think I have a connection problem? I see it now thanks to The Hermit.

I have desired since I “woke up” on this spiritual path to be of service to others, and I know that I cannot do that in a vacuum. The person I am irritated with, I get it now. I perceive this person as being so self-absorbed that they will never take others advice, never take responsibility for the consequences of their actions, and constantly take from others. While I don’t feel I am this way, I think it was showing me the end-result of being wrapped up in your own reality bubble to the point you no longer see the bubbles of others or your effect on them unless it bumps your bubble too hard. We may have our own bubbles, but we are connected to the whole (think of a beehive structure) and we are not islands!

So full circle here…I have become an island. I may be an island of refuge but too much of even a good thing is not great. So I hear you Hermit, and Death, and Two of Swords lady. It might be easier to get off my ass if I knew what to get off of it and actually do, but I hear you. I guess it doesn’t matter which fork in the road I choose as long as it is kind, loving, and in integrity.

Oh, and thank you to the person I was irritated with. I’m sending you my gratitude along the beehive/bubble pathways, but you just aren’t for me right now. I wish you well on your journey though.

And y’all wish me well while taking the PMP exam on Monday. I have been so stressed about this that my physical body is suffering. Only 5 more days though. I have studied hard and expect to pass, and then go on to the next leg of my IT career (which I actually enjoy and am quite good at!).

Blessings, peace, love, kindness, and all things good to you today. Namaste! #missingerin and #LovingErin <3