Musings for 3/7/2016

We-must-be-willing-to-let-go-of-the-life-e14403456417251Ah, letting go seems to be today’s theme. I mean this in the sense of letting go of old energy so that you can embrace new energy. Think of it like updating your software, or hardware for that matter. They release updates for many reasons, including improved performance, updated features, security fixes, to be competitive with other vendors, etc. You can look at replacing the items, and sometimes people, in your life the same way. Please don’t take the people part wrong…if you love them keep them, but others you may find don’t treat you well, are very negative, etc. That’s what I mean there <3

So in the past two weeks, I felt the strong urge to get rid of my favorite but now old sneakers, my white footie socks, my underwear, my gym pants and long sleeve gym shirts, and I even cleaned off my desk and threw away some thing I had been keeping. Now, all of this stuff is over 2 years old and much of it was in good shape, but heavily used. Much of it was at every hospital visit we had with Erin, too. That energy was present every day I used it, but you know, when things are comfortable sometimes you have to get a kick in the arse to make a move.

My favorite shoes…Brooks Cadence 2 in purple. They were the most comfortable, and pretty, pair of sneakers I had worn in ages. First I got a tear in the right foot’s toe area, straight to my toe and sock. LOL! I kept wearing them, even though I felt the old, outdated energy. Oh, and you’re going to love this, the best part was when I brought in some type of biting ants (not fire ants) one morning after feeding the birds. Yeah, that was great. As I dumped them out of my shoe, I knew it was past due, so the shoes went in the garage and I ordered a new pair. I had been putting it off because I couldn’t find that exact pair due to the age, and truthfully my new pair of Brooks doesn’t fit as well, but maybe they are just interim shoes. Anyway…

Now, today, my external hard disk which has 99% of my work stuff on it, and much personal stuff too, says format to use. I’m in IT but just don’t have the damn energy to look up whether I can fix it or not. I mean, really? The whole thing is gone? I had a lot of stuff on there. Damn. But the signs were there too. I recently tried to copy many of the files over to my hard disk but they wouldn’t even copy. That’s a message don’t you think! Yes I’m stubborn – didn’t hear the message. I am most upset about some pictures I may have lost. Damn. Maybe the Universe will let me have those back 🙂

Oh, and the last plant Erin bought for her Fairy Garden, it died. I took good care of it, brought it into the garage for the winter, and one day it just flipping died for no reason. I’ve got a green thumb – trust me there was no reason.

The clear message is, carrying around old energy may not serve us any more. And your clothes, shoes, and other things that you use regularly or have sentimental value may become energetically outdated. If you can’t part with them by yourself, those things usually break or disappear. It just happens.

As a side note, I’m being asked to mention this so I will, and it may be confusing to some so bear with me. As you may now know, I dive deep into esoteric things and metaphysics, and I’ve been shown over and over in various ways how my relationship with Erin is evolving after her body died. So many times, the mother in me has asked, and cried, Why. Couldn’t we have learned these things and evolved with her here? I know the answer is no. She is becoming who she was destined to become, and me too. And we couldn’t have done that here together because we would not have made the right changes. I see it clearly. I could even tell you that if you were a client. But accepting it for myself? Sucks. I don’t wanna. But I get it. One day we will be who we are becoming together, and it will be as it should be. The energy in her body did not withstand this planet any longer, and so it did what was natural and died so that she could be released. So it goes with “things” and sometimes relationships. It’s a natural process that happens so that you can become more than what you are right now.

It is still painful, though, even if it’s just things. My shoes…I really don’t want to part with them. I’ve thought of burying them, or even burning them. Yes, like a freaking funeral. I even said out loud “I owe them that.” What? Yes, sounds nuts, but that’s the attachment I have to them, and truthfully the other items I wore at the hospital day in day out. The ones that caused me pain to wear after, but I didn’t have anything else so then it became a comfort. I may have to ask Shaun to do for me what I apparently can’t do for myself and just throw them away. Ugh. It hurts my heart to think about the whole mess, and it’s a tad embarrassing!

Without blabbering on anymore, y’all clean out your closets and stuff that you know you no longer want or need. You’ll feel like you’ve had what I call an “energetic enema.” ha ha! But seriously, letting go opens space for new things to flow in, and they will. I live my life that way and it’s a real thing. Well usually I do, LOL, and you see what happened to me with the shoes, and the external hard disk, when I didn’t willingly comply.

Namaste, Nutmaste, blessings and love, #missingerin and # lovingerin <3