Dec 15

Some Kindness for Us Grievers

I want to write today about experiences over the weekend, but first let me tell you about the card I just pulled for myself. I had the strong urge today to pull from my Messages from Your Angels deck by Doreen Virtue. I don’t pull from this deck much. I actually bought it for my mother several years ago when she was “into Angels” and when she got dementia, they became mine. I also have a lovely Archangel deck, though, by Doreen if you like that sort of thing. If you are wondering, I don’t have any true Tarot cards because I don’t know how to read them. Maybe one day…

I pulled Shanti, who says “I am the Angel of Peace. I bring you new tranquility, and a smoother road ahead.” Bless her heart, she has a tough order if she’s going to bring me peace! But it was a lovely and much needed message today. As such, I want to type for you the entire message from the little book that comes with it.

“You have been through turmoil, and your soul is tired. Your mind craves peace and quiet, and I am here to help you with that desire. I will give you new opportunities to spend time alone, where you can relax your mind and your heart. I will bring tranquility to your soul so that you can mirror the pace of mind that is your true Divine nature.

Like the angels, you are able to hover within the eye of any hurricanes that may swirl around you right now. Through breath and intention, you can stay centered no matter what’s happening in your life. This inner foundation of peace has a powerful healing effect. Your outer life soon reflects your inner peacefulness. Smooth roads are ahead for you, and the worst is behind you now. A peaceful outcome to this situation is assured.”

I’m glad I took the time to read that, because I don’t always consult the book that comes with, but again a much needed message from Spirit today.

The interesting thing, now that I think about it, is that I have always worked very well in stressful situations. I am able to stay in the eye of the hurricane like it mentions above. But not this time. And that is part of what I have struggled with. There was no shelter whatsoever this time. I have been standing in the midst of the storm, naked and alone (metaphorically), and all that I have wanted was “out.” I still do – I just want it to end. I can imagine that, metaphorically speaking again, once I’m brought in from the storm I will feel much like a torture victim and experience the event over and over forever. There is no escaping the effects of this one. Nope. But if Shanti can help bring me peace, then I will welcome it.

That brings me to this weekend. Shaun and I went out for a little while on Saturday, and we ran into a person he knows and that I just barely know. He asked us how we were, and then very sincerely told us that he didn’t know what to say, that he knew we were awful, and that he didn’t know what else to do except for give us both hugs. He said, I feel like I should say something, but I don’t know what, so I will just give you hugs. I don’t know what this guy’s challenges are in his life, but he is clearly a kind soul and he couldn’t have been more spot on with his sentiments. You see, Shaun and I had just had a conversation while at home, just making small talk I guess, about people who have said nothing to us. Now, I am not saying this to garner sympathy, so please don’t take it that way and do not rush to send me a message or email. I am bringing this up not for myself but for anyone you know who experiences any type of loss. You know, you don’t just grieve people. You grieve relationships, jobs, possessions even. Any loss you will grieve in some fashion.

But yes, it was noticeable those who I have never heard from. It was noticeable those who didn’t show up for Erin’s service (and on the flip side, amazing for who did). I’m not sure what it says about them, but I assume it’s either they simply don’t care of have bad character. Because this guy was right about just saying something. What do you say? You can’t say anything to make me feel better, but you also can’t make me feel worse. I later told another friend who showed up, that her wearing Erin’s wrist band without me ever asking her to, that is enough. So was the guy’s hug. And a simple “I’m sorry.” That’s all – just let someone know you give a damn.

Someone I honestly don’t know well but have known for years, their son died over the weekend. I found out via a message on Facebook that someone I have known several years at work had a daughter who died. Do I view them differently now? Yes, because I know that they not only deserve, but they NEED my kindness more than the average person does. Erin’s death has ruined the rest of my life. I will have a life, yes, but not a great one. I will always have this shit cloud hanging over me and I will always have an open wound that doesn’t ever quite heal. These people do too. One little “I’m sorry” and a hug, it goes a long way.

Again, I am not asking for me. Think of this as a PSA and go out and hug a griever you know. Or at least give them a kind word. They may not be able to articulate it, but they will appreciate it more than you know.

Peace, blessings, and Namaste, and #missingerin

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